Regularity 1

i’m supposed to be writing regularly. An hour. Everyday. Not that i mind. In the 3 months that i had the fortune of spending with myself, writing has come to be something of a hobby. Mind you, not that i’ve never written before. As my parents will confirm, since i was about 11, i’d get these creative urges, about 2-3 times a year. And out of these urges would come a poem. A GOOD poem in fact!!! But then, i grew up, and all i ever wanted was friends. Hang out with them, talk to them, talk about them, and bleh and blah. Maybe it was my way of escaping from home. Or life.

This is boring. I’ve spent the last 3 years crying about these very issues. Now i’m over them. I don’t wanna talk about it anymore. I’m BORED of it!!!! But then, i don’t know what to talk about. Had i been given maybe a few words, like 200 or 400 or 600, i might have been able to think of a topic to write on. But, i type REALLY FAST!!! So writing for an hour is a LOT of writing. At this point i’m very aware of the fact that i’m writing as if i were talking to someone. Who am i talking to??? In the recent past, i’ve begun to have serious doubts about my sanity, and my health. Every small (gas-related) ache in my chest seems like a heart attack. Every (again robably gas-related) ache in my abdomen seems like my appendix has burst. Every headache is a brain tumour. Every pimple is some serious infection. If i like people too much, i think i’m just desperate for, love?? If i don’t like ANYONE, i think i’m building walls around myself to avoid getting hurt. Everyone around me seems perfectly capable of leading a normal, happy life with lots of friends and partying and studying and doing everything exactly the way they should. Makes me wonder if i’m special. And i don’t know whether in the good way or the bad way!!! Even as i type this, i’m contemplating putting it up on my blog. Now, to a normal person, the idea might be unthinkable, for the obvious reason of being thought crazy by everyone!!!! But not to me. Of course i DO hesitate, but not for the obvious reason. I just got AseemBhai’s blogs made into a book, which means that i spent a LOT of time reading the enries. Now, everything i write, seems to me, to be slightly affected by his style of writing. I would usually not get influenced by people’s writing, for i am an intellectual snob. But AseemBhai is, well, AseemBhai. He’s a genius, and one of the very very few people in the world who command my respect, so i don’t really mind. But i don’t want to copy him, or anybody for that matter. So i wonder if maybe me putting this up will make it seem like i’m trying to be him. At the very moment that one part of me is thinking up all these ridiculous lines, and reasons, the other part is telling me to, ahem, FISH everything and put it up nonetheless. Who cares what other people think right??

WOW!!! If ANYONE’s reading this, i’m surprised you made it this far!!!!

I mean,

DON’T YOU HAVE A LIFE???!!!

Lol, sorry, but seriously??? Let alone other people, i myself also know exactly how, umm, ridiculous this piece seems, and it’s a wonder someone else can take it too!!

Hmmm.... maybe I AM that good!! :-p

Phew. I don’t think it’s been an hour yet, but I think I’m done for today!!!

Later!!!

p.s. since I have to write EVERYDAY, and well, I can't ask my poor dad( not that he shouldn't, since he's the one who suggested it in the first place :-p) or poor Andy to read what I ramble on about, these posts will ( hopefully!) becme a regular feature here!!! yaayyy!! :)